and there they are,
angels & panicked saints,
urging me to come to their side,
to heed the clarion call of paupers…
but something else dallies in the wilderness,
coddling my spirit in,
me, regressing into the debris,
conceding my shame,
but here lies a new chapter
of the freshest indifference
to my past & her many indiscretions
And so, into the paradise, I need to launch
But I’d rather sleep…and if I die in the lull,
Tell them all I ever wanted was salvation,
to quiet the noise wisdom brings,
to reform her loud rebukes..
to turn to self,
and rest deeply in my anxious lull,
and I know, I know…eventually the ego’s volition
will bring me to unimaginable chaos…
Maybe then,
I will wake up to meet my iniquities,
and return, with visceral urgency,
to God and his will…
For now, ke bale Ke bale (there they are)
Cheering me on,
smiling even in this extreme,
inspiring my heart…
to heed the gospel of paupers,
to heal in the sacred dust,
to find that madness-transcending peace…
by HIS stripes...
*Was listening to BandaBanda kebale when I wrote this
